Body Image and Physical Disability

I have been getting a lot of content about body positivity from the lens of loving your body for what it can do, instead of how it looks. While I appreciate the sentiment of loving your body, what do you do if your body can't do what you want it to do? This week, I want to talk about body image through the lens of my experience with my body with a physical disability.

I have never been particularly athletic, but I did not know that I had a genetic condition that affected my mobility until I was 16. I suddenly went from walking every day to using a wheelchair semi-regularly. I saw my body as an obstacle to my goals instead of a vessel that carries me. This expanded further with the start of my GI issues. While I have done a lot of work to improve my strength and address my digestive issues, I am not able-bodied and will never fully be. On top of that, I often feel confused and isolated due to being autistic. How can I feel thankful for a body that actively causes me pain, discomfort, and isolation? I don't have all the answers, but I wanted to share some progress I have made towards body positivity for those who can't focus on what their body and brain do to find neutrality.

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1. I focus on my hobbies. I am on an advisory board, create content for this blog, host a website, and pursue my master's degree. On days when I feel worse, I focus on how I can enjoy certain TV shows or be in the company of people I enjoy. I am trying not to focus on food I can eat, because between the GI issues and a love of snacks, my diet can use an overhaul.

2. I reframe how I think of my body. It is easy for me to think of the things I can't do. I can't walk for long distances. I can't wear a lot of shoes because they hurt my feet. I struggle managing large group friend dynamics because there are too many social cues. However, there is a lot I can do. I can write, play board games, take small walks, talk with friends, and more. My body allows me to do that. I might not always love this vessel I am in, but it allows me to go from point A to point B, and I can't exchange it for a new model.

3. I am honest. I am honest with those around me when I am struggling. I have a medical team that doesn't give up on me when I have new medical issues, I am active in therapy, and I am open to alternative medicine within reason. There are safeguards around me so that when I am feeling resentment with my body, or body negativity, I have places to go. If you are reading this and are not sure who you can talk to, I highly recommend therapy and/or talking to a close friend who can give space for feelings.

4. I find outlets. I write poetry and use this blog as a way to process my feelings about my disability. Even if I am not talking about body image specifically, I have an outlet to talk about disability and the ways it affects me. Many of my body image issues are not centered around looks, so working through my feelings around my disabilities helps me to do the reframing work in step two.

5. I find things I like about my body. I like art, so I get tattoos of things I like. This helps me because I then get to wear cool art and have something on my body that I like and purposely choose for myself. However, if you don't like tattoos, jewelry, or other accessories that are not associated with size or mobility can serve this purpose.

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I do not have all of the answers for body image with a disability. As I work through how I see myself, I hope this can serve as a starting place for you if body image is something you struggle with. Thank you for reading about physical disability and body image. If you have any questions or comments, please comment on the blog, reach out at @Anniekrollblog on Instagram or Facebook, or email me at Anniekrollblog@gmail.com. I hope to see you next week!